Work, family, hobbies, passions. Our lives are filled with so, so many things Alhamdulilah. But what happens when thereâ€™s too much? I have the tendency to overfill my days, stuffing them as full as I can until my day planner is virtually whimpering in defeat. And I love helping other people â€“ firstly because I love my friends and seeing them struggle makes me sad but also because I pray that in helping others, I am pleasing Allah.
With all of this, I have a problem saying no even if Iâ€™m not sure just how Iâ€™m going to fit in another item on my to do list for the day. Iâ€™m reluctant to turn down opportunities for myself because who knows when something else will come along and I loathe turning down my friends because I love them and I know they need help and the thought of them not getting it makes me vaguely panicky.
But sometimes, somethingâ€™s just got to give. There are only so many hours in the day and I can only make a minute stretch so far before it breaks and starts begging for mercy. So what do you do when you find yourself in this kind of a predicament?
Well, you definitely shouldnâ€™t do what I did! I refused to admit defeat and just kept letting it all pile up on top of me until the weight felt suffocating and I was so overwhelmed that I managed to do sweet nothing besides eat my body weight in ice cream, pizza and sweets because I needed the comfort of the junk overload and curl into a ball while watching TV and pretending the world outside my little cocoon didnâ€™t exist.
Obviously, that little breakdown ended terribly. But, I did end up learning some things. Most importantly â€“ just as much as I love my friends, so do they love me too. And if I need some time to get my head on straight, theyâ€™ll be willing to give it to. Because theyâ€™re reasonable human beings, not dragons.
I also learned my own limits. I learned that I can handle a certain amount of stress and worry before I shut down in an effort to stop overloading. I wonâ€™t lie and say that I immediately changed my ways and never got near overloading ever again because thatâ€™s a blatant lie and those are rude. But, I learned that I do have a breaking point. I can only do so much before I break myself and when that happens, I might end up letting down ten people instead of turning down two.
So, if youâ€™ve got a tendency to spread yourself too thin like I do, maybe take this little blog post as a cautionary tale. And if youâ€™ve already hit your breakdown and feel like the worst person in the world? Know that youâ€™re not the only one. I did it and I might end up doing it again. Youâ€™re not terrible, youâ€™re just a human whoâ€™s hit their limit and needs to take a step back.
My advice to all of you is to make sure youâ€™ve got wiggle room. These days, even if I might be able to fit something else on my plate, I prefer knowing that Iâ€™ve got a little room to stumble. Just in case. Be kind to yourself and remember, doing ten things badly isnâ€™t necessarily better than doing four beautifully.